Birthday

Yay I'm 26 now. I certainly don't feel it. I think of myself still as... 23 maybe? Out of college, but barely. Regardless, I'm on the other side of my twenties now, and isn't that strange. But such is life and such is time and everything keeps on moving regardless if you do or do not.

I had a pretty lovely day. Went to happy hour with friends and got a free drink and free cake from the waiter (!). Seriously though, is it because I wore make up? If I think back on the times I've gotten free things (not including job fair-esque free stuff lol), it's because there was some form of make up. Would a guy have gotten a free drink? I wonder.

A friend also baked me a cake. She's so talented. Earl grey cake. Soooo delicious. And presents. And well wishes. And messages.

Gah. I feel positively loved. Because birthdays really aren't that special in my mind. It's just another day, isn't it? But having even people come to happy hour to wish me happy birthday is really, really sweet. And if I compare this birthday to last year, gah the difference is immense.

I think I need to learn how to give better gifts. Everybody likes receiving something, right? Clearly this is one of those love languages that I have neglected from my end.

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I have a fig tree in my backyard now. I am seriously in love. I want a fruit tree in all of my backyards now! I want a hammock in my backyard!

I love just walking outside and picking a couple of ripe figs and eating them within minutes. Sun ripened, soft and sweet, the curl of seeds a pale pink when you bite into the center. Gosh, the perfect snack when I don't feel like preparing anything.

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I have roof access. I sorta love it. I really, really like sitting on roof tops. There is something about heights. Whether it's perching on the kitchen counter top or climbing up ladders that weren't put away yet, I just want to sit somewhere high. Sitting on the roof... you stare down at the world from a higher perspective, you can lie back and watch the clouds, or you can just enjoy sitting and watch the birds on the fig tree. I want to bring tea and book out there soon.

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Analogies never work.

Anyone can say
Life is like a free cosmopolitan, or
Life is a never ending race, or
Age is like fine wine, or
Age is like fruit on a tree, or
whatever the hell you want.

Sometimes it just is what it is.

These Days

These days are all about the searching.

The search
for meaning
for beauty
for mercy and grace
for God
and his hand in life and what is moving
for peace and acceptance
for joy
for satisfaction in the things i do
for comfort and warmth

I am searching for all these things daily. Even when I am talking to friends, or walking down the stairs to the fridge of this new place. It's all a reminder, it's a new territory.

There is so much beauty in the world. After Alaska, I think that all the more. Snow covered mountains that stretch across the entire horizon, the crisp air and chill at my fingertips, the mist of the clouds hanging so low, the waves underneath my feet, the sunset turning the entire sky orange and reflecting off the ocean for miles and miles, the spray of ocean. I just wanted to close my eyes and turn my head towards the sky and soak it all in until these moments are buried in my heart. Because oh, the world is worth it. Because there is still beauty and lovely things to be seen.