Mostly because I've been spending as if I thought money grew on trees.
I'm a little weirded out by my level of want/need these days. Before I lived with med school roommates, I really did live the minimalist life. That frugal college life that was also impacted by frugal Asian parents that persistently told me to turn off the lights if we left the house to save energy; to keep the temperature high in the summer and low in the winter to keep bills low; to only buy only if you needed it. Did you actually need a toaster? No, you can use your skillet to heat up your bread. Do you need to decorate your room? Nah, you're moving in a year anyway.
But it's like that transition from stupid flip phones to smart phones. It's really, really, really hard to go back. Almost nigh impossible. I have yet to hear of a person who went back to non-smart phones willingly.
And when you "upgrade" your life, it's really hard to go back. I'm used to a lot of house luxuries that apartments may or may not have. And I really don't want to go without.
And I can't tell if that's because I'm spoiled now or because that's a new normal.
And that's the weird, weird thing that I consistently realize. That everyone's normals are completely different. What was my normal five years ago is not my normal now.
But then again, I am no longer in Texas. So of course nothing is completely normal.
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I am not really homesick.
But more thoughts on that later.
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