equilibrium

I've been thinking on equilibrium recently.

This idea that there is a sort of equilibrium between the you that you show to the world, and the you on the inside who only you know -or a precious few as well-.

There must be a porous membrane between the two, where some of the inside you bleeds through and people see the marks of your heart on the outside you. They call it "wearing your heart on your sleeve". All of your emotions, all of your thoughts, all the fears and doubts and happiness and strange quirks and weird idiosyncrasies that are unique to you, just you, only you.

I am always surprised at the people that have a paper thin barrier, one that might not even exist. The people that willingly talk about their current struggles, reveal slightly embarrassing pasts, are unabashedly forthcoming of their odd habits.

I am not that brave. I am not willing to be that vulnerable.
In theory, I guess.